The first few days after surgery

The first few days after surgery I realized I wouldn't be able to do this alone. I don't know if it was the shock of the strict bed rest or the emotional state of mind I was in.

My husband has been wonderful. He made it priority one to make sure I had everything I needed whenever I needed it, but I was still so scared. The first weekend home, my husband bought me a netbook to keep me busy, and set me up on the couch with everything in an arm's reach. I thought I would be okay, but then Monday came and all hell broke loose.

I decided to sleep in, and that meant I was sleeping upstairs and then going downstairs to spend the rest of the day on the couch. But that didn't go as smooth as I had hoped.

Before I could naturally wake up to move downstairs, the house alarm went off, and out of the bed I went, with no thought that I was on bed rest. For all I knew my life was in danger and someone could have been breaking into our house. After walking around the house with a high heel in my hand, wearing my care bear PJs, and trying to scare the possible intruder (laughing is allowed). I realized Bellsouth was working on our phone lines, as scheduled, and I just forgot... That was the first moment I realized I couldn't do this alone, at least not right now.

Once I calmed down from the alarm, I decided I needed to rest my nerves before going downstairs, so I rested upstairs till noon. I was starving. Who was I kidding, I need to feed me and the baby. So I got up and went downstairs to eat, and to camp out on the couch till my husband would get home.

Everything was going good until about 3:oopm. I realized I had spilled my huge water bottle all over the carpet... So what did I do? I had to clean it up. This is when I totally lost it. I was on my hands and knees mopping up a two foot by two foot area of water crying. I was a mess.

Here it was my first day alone and two things that should never have happened, had happened... To a normal person without the stress of possibly loosing her baby or just getting out of surgery a few days earlier, I'm sure neither things would have bothered them. But to me they were enough to send me over the edge.

My husband came home later that day and we discussed my day of activies. He was so concerned for me and Lily. We just didn't know what to do. He couldn't stay home with me each day so something else had to be done. We decided the best person to call was my mother. She had offered from day one but we thought we'd be fine. And plus I figured I would wear my husband out first before calling on any friend or family members... That didn't last that long.

The next day (Tuesday) my mom drove up, ready and prepared to take care of me. I was much relieved. In no time at all things were fitting right into place. She got me organized and took me to see my doctor as a precaution. Monday night I was having some cramping. My husband and I just figured it was from the stress of my first day alone, but wanted to make sure. The doctor told us I was okay and just needed to rest.

Since my mom was in the house and I knew I wasn't alone, I was able to relax and get the rest that Lily and I much needed. Lets just hope the rest of the week goes as smooth.